【2015 Archives】

Death015 Archivesan inevitable part of Overwatch.

Sometimes I step onto a Junkrat trap and eat a grenade, sometimes D.Va drops an ultimate right on my head and I explode, sometimes I get pulled off a cliff by a gravity-defying feat of technology.

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There are so many ways to die in Overwatch;some of them heroic, some of them hilarious, but generally all of them frustrating. But occasionally, depending on what character skin my assailant is wearing, it just rubs it in a little deeper. And on the very rare occasion, a character with a particular skin will kill me and I'll think "Yes, this is how it was meant to be."

Here are the top 10 Overwatchskins I've been killed by, both good and bad.

10. Baihu Genji

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When Baihu Genji enters the fray, I feel like I'm a Dark Soulsboss about to be vanquished by a well-armored adventurer. When he hits that Dragonblade ultimate, I know my time is up. I'll put in a good fight, sure, but he's faster and stronger than me, and he deserves to vanquish me with armor and a blade like that.

9. Biker Reaper

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It hurts on a deep, emotional level to get killed by Reaper because oftentimes he materializes behind me and blasts me away with his shotguns before I even have enough time to turn around. When he's wearing his motocross outfit with the word "Edge" literally written on the side, it just feels like I'm being completely humiliated by a pre-teen.

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8. Nutcracker Zenyatta

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There's nothing quite like getting killed by a healer in Overwatch, especially when it's Zenyatta hurtling a handful of small metal balls into your head. But with the nutcracker skin, those balls and transformed into walnuts and Zenyatta's face is transformed into a creepy, vacant, and vaguely horrifying nutcracker face. Getting blasted with a bunch of walnuts while getting stared down by Nutcracker Zenyatta is a truly horrible experience.

7. Formal Doomfist

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Getting hit by a car doesn't seem like it would be a fun time, but if I had a chocie, I guess I'd prefer to get hit by a cool, fancy, expensive car. That's what it's like to be punched to death by Formal Doomfist, the best-dressed hero in Overwatch. You're going to die, why not do it with a a whole lot class slamming right into your face?

6. Yeti Winston

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If I saw a yeti face to face in the real world, I would accept my death. When Yeti Winston hits his ultimate and comes at me in a painful flurry of fists, I accept my death. I deserve it. What was I thinking, imagining I could go toe to toe with a yeti? They're built to kill. I am nothing but prey.

5. Lifeguard McCree

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Lifeguard McCree doesn't save me when I'm drowning, no. He pumps me full of lead. But he looks good doing it. It's honestly an honor to be murdered by this shirtless version of McCree. He clearly works hard at keeping himself in shape, and do you think he does that for himself? No. He does that for us.

4. Grillmaster: 76

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There is no skin more "dad" than Soldier: 76's Grillmaster skin. It's dorky. It's corny. It's completely impractical for a firefight. It's not because he's embracing his dad status that it sucks to get killed by Grillmaster: 76, it's because he clearly wasn't ready for battle. It's embarrassing to get shot by a guy wearing cargo shorts and a floral shirt.

3. Pink Mercy

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I have to show respect for Pink Mercy. When this wingéd healer busts out her sidearm and ends me with a handful of well-placed bullets, and I see she's wearing pink, I can't help but receive those bullets graciously. Each Pink Mercy skin I see means that much more money was donated to support breast cancer research, so when Pink Mercy kills me, I know I'm, in a weird way, contributing to a good cause.

2. Pajamei

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Pajama-clad Mei just rolled out of bed. She didn't even bother putting on her battle attire. She doesn't need to, because she knows she's that much better than you. Getting frozen in place by Pajamei and finished off with an icicle in the head is the epitome of embarrassment. She wiped the floor with me, and she barely even had to try.

1. Gridironhardt

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There's something about getting bodied by a giant man in a giant, armored, football uniform that feels right. Seeing that giant football man fly toward me, knowing that there's no way I can get out of the way, my life flashing before my eyes, I am content. This is how it should be. Gridiron Reinhardt is a champion, as seen on his left arm and the trophy instead in place of his usual hammer head. That means I'm the loser. That's just how the world works; the circle of life. And I'm just glad to be a part of it, slammed up against a wall, dead.

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